Such Language! Part 25

More lexigraphic levity and laughter, courtesy of the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue. Enjoy!

Bottle-headed: Void of wit. (I was so tongue-tied when introduced to that handsome young earl at Almack’s last night that I could scarce utter a word, and I’m sure he thinks me completely bottle-witted.)

Trap sticks: Thin legs, gambs: from the sticks with which boys play at trap-ball. (Uncle Simon’s tailor is so skilled at making trousers that he can even make uncle’s trap sticks look shapely and muscular.)

Clunch: An awkward clownish fellow. (My new horse is such a clunch that I don’t dare ride him in Rotten Row, lest my friends all mistake him for a circus pony.)

Scaly: Mean, sordid. (Great-aunt Agatha’s tips are so scaly that there’s not a single crossing-sweeper in London who’ll sweep a way for her.)

Long Meg: A jeering name for a very tall woman: from one famous in story, called Long Meg of Westminster. (My statuesque friend Alice complains that the worst part of being such a Long Meg is that her dresses need an extra half-yard of fabric and therefore cost more than everyone else’s.)

Gilly Gaupus:  A Scotch term for a tall, awkward fellow. (Fortunately, Alice’s betrothed, Lord Maclathy, is not only himself a Gilly Gaupus, but also a very wealthy man.)

Laid up in lavender: Pawned. (This is the seventeenth time my brother’s watch-chain and fobs have been laid up in lavender; I think he’s run out of friends to help him retrieve them.)